Joy to the World

I have made it officially to Christmas break. It's hard to believe only a semester ago I was graduating, thinking to myself, "am I really willing to leave?" My life back home feels light years away, and I rather feel like I pressed pause on life and jumped into a dream. That's why over the past few months my internet usage has been scarce-- it's at times easier for me just not to think about people back home. I feel a collision of emotions... I feel deep satisfaction living and working in Tela, and rarely do I get those feelings of homesickness. I do though miss sharing in the lives of my friends and family. 

 It's been interesting spending the Christmas season in another country. December 1st marked the beginning of the Holiday festivities, and Tela made merry by having a special tree lighting street fair. A huge tree-shaped wire contraption was lit as well as lights all over town. There was live music and plenty of food and drink.   In our neighborhood, the popular way to celebrate the holidays is to shoot off firecrackers which sound like gunshots. I guess right outside the gate of my apartment is the coolest place to shoot them off, too.   At school, we all tried to decorate our classrooms, (I haven't mastered that aspect of teaching yet), and then each teacher was responsible to lead their class in some kind of Christmas performance. Some performed the Nativity scene, others choreographed dances or sang songs. I decided to keep it simple and found a gospel choir version of "Joy to the World". I tried to get them to all step in rhythm (Left--Right--Left--Right) and sing the correct lyrics on the correct pitch. I fortunately also found the perfect opportunity to incorporate "jazz hands".  Now generally I don't get all that enthusiastic when I have to teach my kids something that they will have to perform for a celebration (we have had many), but for some reason this time was different. I had a great song picked, and the second my kids heard it they were in love with it. I even got choked up the first time we sang it together! 


 Last night night was the big performance, and thanks to some very dedicated parents, my kids were decked out in sparkling fedoras and gold bow-ties.  They may not have gotten all the lyrics down, and the left-right-left-right may have been off, but I did accomplish my main goal, and that was for my kids to not only show joy, but to feel it. Joy has yet to be one of our weekly vocabulary words, but I think they know the meaning of that word better than most of the others I have taught. I could tell they felt proud of themselves, and I felt like a pleased parent with a giant grin on my face.

Quick Trivia: White-tailed Deer are a part of which animal group?

I'm proud of my students and proud of myself, too. The majority of them have improved immensely in their English, and it is such a blessing for me that I can see the progress I am making with them.  A few weeks back I decided to write an integrated science unit based off a reader's theater in their science book called "Forest Friends".  The skit was about the different animal groups and their traits, and all my kids were in a different animal group.  We even made masks in class and performed the act in the library in front of a very receptive audience of five. It was a lot of fun for them and for me, and I think it was then that I really started to realize how much I truly love my kids.  As much as I daydream about having a job where I could just hang up my hat at the end of the work day and not have to plan, I have lately felt quite strongly that God has not led me astray, and that I have been blessed to have found a job that both challenges me and fulfills me.  I've found joy.


Some highlights from the past few months:

Pulhapanzak: If not for the fact that I was holding hands
with two people as we walked below this cascade, I would
not have survived.

• Going to Tocoa for a weekend and staying with a neighbor's family. A little boring at times, a little uncomfortable, too, but a very interesting learning experience.
• Exploring more of Tela. We aren't as timid to leave the house now, and we have stumbled onto some great places and people; (Joe, Andy, Ian, Kyla, Sarah, Danielle, and a German couple who sell the BEST garlic bread EVERRRR!)
• Getting to know some of the families of my students. I feel very respected and appreciated by them, and I have come to enjoy bumping into them around town. I was even invited to a birthday party last week, which ended up being fun.
• Spending time with my fellow gringas Anne and Becky. We made Christmas wreathes last week out of tree branches outside of Anne's apartment. These two seriously have helped me keep my sanity. 
• I've been to a few neighborhood soccer games and have found myself really enjoying the atmosphere. I just wish my Morelia gang were here to fly the crazy gringo flags. I can't do it alone!
• Receiving mail: Thanks Val and Grandma! Those were two very special days for me!
• THANKSGIVING WEEKEND: it was just plain epic. Thinh was here visiting, Anne cooked an INCREDIBLE dinner, and then we re-visited Lago de Yojoa where we hiked behind/under a waterfall and later sang songs around a campfire.

I've enjoyed writing this post, and I am so glad I finally had time to sit and think. I have been running on adrenaline lately and with Christmas break in sight, I haven't allowed myself to slow down.  With a homecoming so near, I'm excited yet a little anxious, too.  I have many people I want to see, places I want to visit, and chores that I can't avoid.  In such a short time, I know I will have to leave before I am ready.  The idea of coming home and leaving again feels a little like picking open an old scab.  I'm praying that God calms these feelings of restlessness so that I am able to enjoy, be blessed, and return to Tela rejuvenated rather than distraught.  

At this time of year many people become nostalgic, and despite the firecrackers, I have not been able to fully embrace the Christmas spirit. So, let it snow PLEASE and if you are lucky enough to see me when I am home I hope you are willing to put up with an overwhelming amount of silly Christmas funtimes! Feliz Navidad, y que el paz de Dios sea con ustedes. 

work in progress

I have been waiting for this magic moment. I just knew one day God would give me the profound wisdom to articulate of the growth which I have experienced during my teaching adventure in Tela, Honduras. I am aware of the fact that I have been here two months, and people in my life may want to know what is going on and how I am doing, but I just couldn't begin a post. I excused myself at times for lack of joy, lack of health, or lack of cleverness. I trusted that the day would come in which I would finally have the inspiration I needed to write to the world of my infectious enlightenment. 


Well, I realize now that that day will never come. I will never have everything figured out, nor will my emotions ever be tamed. God is working on me, it is a painful process, and my heart has been on a roller-coaster since the moment I flew out of O'Hare. But nothing worth having is easy, and I am encouraged by the thought that in me God is creating something wonderful. I cannot wait for the day on which I can look back and see some of the ways in which God was shaping me while in Honduras. 

I can already see some of the ways. I came here for two specific goals: to become a better teacher, and to sharpen my Spanish skills. I saw this period as very beneficial to my future, but as for my present, I thought of it more as a sentence I was serving. I still struggle with a certain mindset that I am counting down the months until I can go back. However, I have intentionally been trying to view this experience differently. I want to gain wisdom, peace, and joy from day-to-day experiences.  Everyday is an opportunity for growth, and I am beginning to open my eyes to the simple ways in which God works. This is something I hope to carry with me for the rest of my life, no matter where I am. 


Being here has presented many difficulties, but in many ways, I find my life here to be quite peaceful.  I feel cared for without question by friends, neighbors, and co-workers. I have learned a lot about giving freely. The people here are incredibly generous in every aspect of the word. I work very hard at my job, and I find myself becoming more in tune with my students every week. I can see them not only learning, but becoming more confident individually.  In those instances I feel God's assurance that I am doing the right thing.

  As a teacher, I feel incredibly free. I can be as creative as I want to be here, which has been a great outlet for me. I feel like I am back on stage, singing, acting, dancing, entertaining. Teaching is hard; teaching is fun. The day I learned to be patient and control my temper was the day I began to realize what good teaching should be. I have a long way to go, but I am glad I made that realization early on.


I have been thinking recently about how much more I appreciate small, simple things here. Some of the wonderful simple gifts that I can appreciate here are:


 sunny days;  coloring on the front porch with the neighbor kids; coming home from work to an iced coffee or a bag of peanut m&m's; doing laundry or cleaning the house (I know, right? But it feels so familiar and I like it!); having a bike lent to me which allows me to go anywhere I want easily; playing games with the couple next door, whom I have adopted as my Honduran abuelitos; the ocean being a ten-minute walk away; the lush vegetation; being welcomed home by neighbors; hearing my students scream "Hi Miss!" when they see me in public; meeting people around Tela or in the other places I have been able to travel; being able to travel cheaply and deciding to do so at a moments notice; a hot shower in the morning, and a soft bed at night. 


I am so thankful for all the people in my life. Thank you for support, prayers, and encouragement. Please continue, as I have many times felt my spirit lifted! Perhaps I will have some divine wisdom to share on my next post, but probably not!

half-way

It's spring break for Chicago Public Schools, which means I have completed half of my student teaching. Only five weeks to go!

This is one of the first projects that I led my third-graders in. They learned how to research and create biography books. Most of them really enjoyed it, as they got to choose who they included in the book. They all became very curious. The curriculum in Chicago Public Schools does not leave much room for social studies, because the state test is solely over language arts and math. It was very exciting to see them light up while reading about Amelia Earhart, to hear questions about racism when reading about Martin Luther King Jr, and connect to their own cultures while reading a biography of Benito Juarez. We all read a biography of Yo-yo Ma together, and most of them wrote to me that it was their favorite. Since many students at this school are a  

part of orchestra, I hope that they were inspired to continue in their art! (I know, I know, I should never have quit the violin! But my violin was donated to this school's orchestra last year, and it gives me joy to know that it is now in the hands of a more appreciative student!)

In other news, I am heavily in the midst of job-hunting. To be honest, I would love to teach at the school where I am student teaching now, but Chicago Public Schools is really only hiring from the 400 teachers it had to lay-off this year. I am told that hundreds will be retiring afer this upcoming year, including 14 from my school, and have been given the advice to ''hang in there one year'' numerous times. Which left me in the quandry of what to do in the meantime!

I have looked into charter schools, teacher aid positions, and suburban schools, and I am still not completely closed off to working in any one of those areas, but I have recently felt that I should go teach in Latin America.  Most Latin American schools require only a year's committment, and are not opposed to hiring new teachers, an issue that I have been running into with American schools.  I feel that this is a logical move for me to make, since I inevitably want to work in Latin America in the future.

 I also feel God moving throughout this process. I feel much like I felt when I was choosing a college, except only more uncertain and overwhelemed. God is really challenging me to trust him again. In my first post, I boldly claimed that to leave your comfort zone is to give yourself the opportunity to grow, and I could almost audibly hear God saying, ''All right Alyssa, put your money where your mouth is!''

I don't want to say too much yet, but I will say that I have an interview (video chat) with the superintendent from a bilingual school in Honduras this week. There is network of Christian bilingual schools who has some open positions. Taking a job there would mean a lot to my future, although it would definitely be a financial struggle. This school, along with most schools I have come across, can offer only a meager monthly stipend as well as living costs paid for. However, an opportunity like this is a great way to impress American schools! (and to grow, become better at Spanish, trust God, etc&etc).

 

Needless to say, the thing I am in most need of right now is prayer. Please pray that God will lead me to make the right decision. Pray that I can continue to juggle student teaching along with everything else going on.

I am always open to looking into other job opportunities; I have not decided 100% on going to Latin America, so if anyone has any leads, please do not hesitate to inform me!

Peace, y'all.

Juggling

As much as I should be working on homework, doing laundry, resting, applying to schools, or any one of the other items on my list to check off (showering perhaps should be on the list as well,) I feel that I just want to blog. So sorry, Mom and Dad, I know that you are both going to be annoyed at me because of how much I've been complaining about having a full plate, but I am going to include here a quick update. I'm feeling inspired, so I'm going with it.

I just got back from my Wednesday night class with my Discovery Channel instructor. We talked a lot tonight about identity and how knowing ones self is a key element to teaching. So through this blog, I am actually sharpening my craft. This is not time wasted! His lecture was encouraging to me because although I may not be a ready-made teacher, and I have a long road ahead of me before I "master" any techniques (mastery here, not being literal: we've been taught over and over that one never "masters" the art of teaching,) I am suitable because I know myself. I will be able to make connections to and for my students in an authentic way, and I will have the privilege of doing so in my own unique way. Man, it feels good to be affirmed sometimes. Always.

Speaking of affirmation, I was fortunate enough to have a letter of recommendation written for me by my ESL professor. She is a very impassioned woman and I have had the opportunity to make a connection with her over the time that I have been her student. Her letter moved me to tears, and I feel very honored. I want to share it with you guys because you're the people who I know feel proud on my behalf. My honor is your honor. So please, take credit for some of the wonderful things she has mentioned: you are those who have shaped me to be the person that I am.

February 25, 2011



To Whom It May Concern,

It is with great pleasure that I write this recommendation for Alyssa Van Eerden who has been a student of mine at North Park University in Chicago during the 2010-2011 School Year. For the duration of that time, Alyssa was a true asset to the classes that I taught, in the ESL Teacher Endorsement Program. Her outstanding ability to analyze, critique and write resulted in her always producing excellent and scholarly work. Alyssa consistently demonstrated very strong study habits and was one of the most superb students in all of my classes. Alyssa has a drive to learn and is truly a life- long learner. She is also a very conscientious and committed student and strives at accomplishing her endeavors, always going above and beyond.
I recently had the opportunity to supervise Alyssa during her mini teaching practicum in an elementary class at Mary Seat of Wisdom School in Park Ridge, Illinois. I must say that she is a very strong teacher candidate. She is a natural born teacher and presents her lessons in such a motivating and enthusiastic manner that the students are eager to learn and fully participate in class work, discussions, and activities. She demonstrates great knowledge, talent, and technological expertise which she so creatively applies to her lessons and always implements teaching approaches that are sensitive to different learning and performance styles. Alyssa shows great compassion and understanding for multiculturalism, global issues, and diversity. This can be attributed to her studies in ESL, traveling and studying abroad. Her enthusiasm and love for foreign languages, diverse cultures and in general learning, enhance the environment in which she teaches. Alyssa is also very good at classroom management and did a fabulous job with the students during her observations.
Lastly, I must comment on her very pleasant personality and outlook. She is a very friendly, energetic and positive minded person. She is also a very conscientious and committed student/teacher and strives at accomplishing her endeavors. She conducts herself in a very professional manner and demonstrates the qualities of a fine teacher.
In writing this recommendation, I am sure that Alyssa will prove that her exceptional qualities are indeed the exact requirements that are needed in any academic setting. Should you need additional information, please do not hesitate to contact me.

Sincerely,


Angelyn Balodimas-Bartolomei, Ph.D.
Associate Professor-Coordinator
ESL Teachers' Endorsement Program
Professor of Comparative International Education
School of Education
North Park University

Haggling

My mom didn't really haggle me to write another post... but she did remind me that I was going to try to post once a week. I tend to not follow through on those kinds of promises... but alas, I will try!

So here is what the world looks like to me nowadays. My sunny apartment, and a frozen wasteland. I try to avoid stepping outdoors if I can. I would gladly give up a daily shower to live in a place that did not get so freaking cold!

So I am in a class right now called Social and Cultural Diversity, and as much as love those topics in general, I was not looking forard to this class. The way this school shoves diversity down our throats here gets a little sickening. But the class is surpsisingly refreshing, since we're being taught by an adjunct who works for the DISCOVERY CHANNEL!

Anyway, we had an assignment in which we had to talk in depth about our identities. As I was writing it, I thought "this would be a good blog post". Pardon me if it's redundant; I'm killing two birds with one stone here. Here's to getting an A!

           My identity is linked to those who are most important in my life: my mother and father, brother and sister, my extended family, my friends, and my boyfriend.  Not only have these people helped shape me into who I am, but they also influence my decisions because I know that the decisions I make will affect their lives.  For this reason, I try to make the decisions which will most positively reflect upon them.  I was taught this value from a very young age; embarrassing the family was something I was never to do.  I remember one time at a family reunion I talked back to my mom in front of a huge group of people. This memory sticks out to me because I remember the shame that I felt on her behalf, which caused me to feel ashamed, too.

            As I have grown up and become more independent of my family, my friends have become more a part of my identity. When I first came to North Park, I felt identity-less because I was far away from my high school friends, and had no one here.  I scrambled to find people to put into my circle, and clutched at any connection I made, no matter how small. These times were hard for me, because I ended up finding myself with people who didn’t share similar values as me.  I ended up with people who did not appreciate me for who I was, and who backstabbed and gossiped behind my back.  After being here four years, I have few friends from that time in my life, although the ones who have remained since the beginning are some of my most loyal friends. For the most part though, I have encountered new people along the way.   I feel that I now have the most solid group of friends that I have ever had. We are like-minded, both in nature and because of how we’ve shaped each other. It scares me to think about us going our separate ways in the coming future. However, I have become more rooted in the person that I am over these four years.  I don’t think that my identity comes as much from people anymore, although people have helped create the foundation. I believe that I can go fourth and do what I feel called to do, and that certain people will remain in my life, and that others will come in as needed.

            There is a certain truth onto which I cling, and as Sunday-school as this may sound, I have to believe that my identity is foremost that of a daughter of Christ.  I can feel his calling to me.  The more I listen, the more direction he gives. I realize now that some of the past events of my life were not random; rather they are inextricably linked to my destiny.  I never saw myself becoming a teacher, even after I started down the education track at North Park, I still had this tugging fear that I was not on the right path. As I continued my studies here, and found that I really had a passion for the Spanish language and for Latin American culture, I wondered if I should give up the whole being a teacher thing, and focus my studies on my “real” passion. I discovered after actually teaching in a classroom, though, that I really am passionate about teaching. I realized that my two passions were not mutually exclusive; rather, they harmonize with each other in such a way that I believe my destiny is to pursue both, never having to chose one over the other. Someday I plan to move to Latin America and be a teacher there, and maybe open a school. I have big dreams and I know that a lot of preparation must come first, but I am thrilled to have a sense of purpose. It is a God-given purpose, and that is the most fulfilling objective that I could never have imagined for myself.

            As I am on the brink of emerging into the real-world, I pray that I will not lose sight of who I am and who I feel called to be.  I worry that money will become too important to me, especially as I try to pay off my loans. This is an area in which I feel my identities colliding. To not be able to pay off my loans would be a great shame to my family and quite frankly would ruin them as I know that they would then have to take responsibility for it.  However, I know that the places to which I feel called hold no promise of great money.  I worry about my faith slipping and that I will lose trust in God to be the great provider that he is, and that I will take a job that I know is not right for me simply because it will pay better.

            Today though, and for the coming months, I can only trust and hope that what is meant to happen will happen.  I look back on my life and I see that everything happened for a reason, and I have to believe that that will continue to be the case. I will cherish the relationships that God has blessed me with, and continue to seek ideas and values in other people which I want for myself. These people will be those who hold me accountable. I know my brother, for instance, will never let me become a money-hungry yuppie.  My boyfriend will continue to encourage me to fight injustice, as he himself strives to be an injustice fighter.  My parents will never let me forget who my God is, and as much as it annoys me sometimes, I take great comfort in the fact that my mom will never stop asking me how my “walk with God” is.  As I look back on my life, I see that although my identity was first constructed by the people in my life, it can now stand alone because it is rooted in my faith and values, only needing maintenance once in awhile.

progress thus far

I have always been sort of opposed to blogging. It seemed egotistical to me. Also I just don't like the idea of posting personal things on the internet. My thoughts have changed lately due to the fact that I just don't see my family very often, especially grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. I want you all to know how God is working in my life because I desire mutual encouragement. This seems like the most practical way to do that! 

I think you all know that I was in Mexico last month. This two-week "stint" was incredibly inspiring for me. God revealed a lot to me about my life during that time, and I feel blessed to have a much clearer sense of direction, especially as I've begun my last semester of college! 

 I can't remember exactly how that saying goes; something like "hindsight is 20/20". I could not agree more. I remember my senior year of high school, how much I loved my life at home, going to Mars Hill every Sunday with my family; being involved in the children s ' ministry at the Bridge Street House of Prayer; my friends were amazing and I even loved my job waiting tables at Hunan Chinese Restaurant. I don't remember who I said this to, but I definitely remember saying:

Why am I leaving this place that I love, where I am surrounded by the people I love?

Likening myself to Abraham, I continued to feel a tug to go to North Park, even though it was literally the only school far from home that I was considering. I knew virtually nothing about it, and no clue what I wanted to study. I was not being awarded any huge scholarships at North Park, yet when I stepped onto this campus I knew: this was where I was supposed to be.

This neighborhood, for those of you who have not been here, is unattractive and at times dangerous, but North Park has an overpowering sense of tranquility. Over the years, even the neighborhood itself has become a refuge for me. Miles from downtown, my home is full of diversity and richness, languages and culture. We North Park students laugh at some of the slogans of North Park, but these values have become my own, and it is where God started planting roots in my mind and soul.

Certain events that have occurred over the past four years that were seemingly insignificant at the time are now making complete sense to me. The fact that I came to North Park in the first place, for instance, was seemingly random and frankly irresponsible, as well as my trip to Bolivia in 2008. I probably would not have continued studying Spanish had it not been for that trip. I would not have decided to study education had it not been for the fact that one summer I decided that I did not want to work at PVI and gotten a job at a pre-school. These decisions have had a great affect on me, and have helped me narrow down my plans for the future.

It's pretty amazing how God works; he can use a decision that we've made, maybe without the right intention, to better us. For example, I'm not ashamed to admit that a big reason that I decided to lead the trip to Mexico that I just went on was that I had just come home from my study abroad trip, and was just looking for the next easy way to go back. Although this was not necessarily a bad intention, it certainly was not the right motivation to go. I definitely became much more engaged with the trip specifically as we recruited and planned. Even still, the night before our flight out of Chicago I felt like I did not want to go, and could think only of how excited I was to come back to Chicago. God opened my eyes and my heart during this trip however and I know now that it was always his plan that I go to this remote mountain village in Mexico.

I visited my first graders today and showed them this picture, taken from the village we stayed in. The wondered what would happen if someone tried to jump into the cloud?